XMAS GOLD

by 4Shadows

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about

This annual event happens but once a year.

Here at 4Shadows HQ, aka The Vault, we have been keeping lists & we invite you to celebrate the ambivalence of the season with us.

And remember: it's always darkest before the dawn. Unless you're in Seattle. Then it's just dark.

credits

released December 4, 2016

Kitchen Wainwright & Zverina for songs beginning with XMAS;
Kitchen Millis Wainwright & Zverina for songs ending XMAS.

This surefire holiday classic produced by www.zverina.com

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4Shadows Seattle, Washington

No brakes. No map. No going back.

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Track Name: XMAS oh no!
christmas! christmas!
auugh!

oh god, not again!
auugh!

give me something stupid!
christmas! give me more!

christmas! christmas!
[shouting, moans]

oh god, not again!
i can't repent.

i can't eat my soup
looking at you

please tell me i'm not really related to you!

yes, children, it's xmas again
and we know how bad you have been

angels are crashing through my window

auugh!

oh god, no, it's christmas again!
Track Name: XMAS riot
all i want for xmas is some clean coal
i'm gonna put it in my sock

then i'm gonna swing it around
throw it like a rock

all i want for xmas is an army of cops
i like their riot shields and elbow guards

marching down the street
lookin' for you and me

all i want for xmas
is to be shot by SWAT

aw gee! ain't it neat?
the tanks are coming down our street

it's gonna be fun when all is said and done
they've got smoke bombs and a beanbag gun

it's a XMAS RIOT!
XMAS RIOT!

(what?)
Track Name: XMAS curfew
here come the police
on christmas eve

better watch your Ps and Qs!
don't cross the street on xmas eve

don't climb the tree
make sure to be merry... and bright!

...or you won't survive

dress like Jesus and walk through the mall
handing out candy and Gauloises

dragging a cross...
crucify yourself in the foodcourt!

then get a burrito from the guy

might as well pick up a pair of pants for yourself
and a book about the Crimean War

...you need something to talk about xmas morn

then take a stroll through the parking lot
looking for your truck...

you can't remember where you parked!
Track Name: XMAS krieg
[German]

he says when he was a child
they used to stab each other
with icicles

[German]

then they would go sit by the fire
and examine each others' wounds

[German]

there were prizes, like a cookie,
for who had the deepest puncture

[German]

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7--
that's how many stab wounds
he once inflicted

[German]

rats and dogs were then invited
to lick their head wounds

[German]

and then they would roast marshmallows
over the burning bandages

[German]

one time they put an icicle
in Peter's mother's apron

[German]

and then it melted, dripping on the floor
where it mixed with our blood

[German]

one time he forgot who he was

[German]

where are his lederhosen? you swine!
Track Name: XMAS feelings
i want feelings for xmas
i want feelings for xmas

i cannot feel a thing
i cannot feel a thing

i want feelings for xmas
i want emotion, too

i am a robot so are you!
i am a robot so are you!

give me feelings
i want feelings
give me feelings

give me feelings
i want feelings
i can't feel a thing

i am automaton
i can do nothing wrong
i've become automaton
somebody turn me on

give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
santa claus, give me feelings!

give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings
give me feelings

i want feelings for xmas!
i want feelings for xmas!
i want feelings for xmas!
i want feelings for xmas!
Track Name: XMAS runaway
christmas on a greyhound bus

you're never alone on a bus
bound away from home

gotta make a getaway
gotta break away
got to snake it out of town

can't stand the thought
of eating fruitcake
around the xmas tree

it's a good time to break free
it's time to be who you're meant to be

gotta make a break
run away! be free!

why not disappear
like gifts from under the tree?

burn it down
burn it down
burn it down!

christmas runaway
it's your chance to break free
good bye, good night, good luck
to the family -- RUN AWAY!

ow, ow. how'd that song go?
la la la, la la la la la, la la la...?

[general breakdown]

xmas runaway
run away
on xmas day

[repeat endlessly]

there's nowhere to run
there's nowhere to hide

every single thing
is covered with eyes!

ho ho ho ho ho ho!
la la la, ho ho ho.

they're watching you
they're watching me
they're watching he
they're watching she

everyone is watching everyone
ho ho ho! christmas, christmas...

run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day
run away on xmas day

RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!

where are we going to go?
there's nowhere left to go!

they bombed it all to smithereens
...for christmas!
Track Name: XMAS in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse

bring in those cows!
bring in those cows!

you will never be more free
than when you are hanging
from the ceiling
by ankle chains

christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse
christmas in the slaughterhouse

bring in the cows!
Track Name: XMAS GOLD
XMAS GOLD!

the wise men brought gold
the wise men brought gold
the wise men brought gold

mary and joseph were poor
mary and joseph were poor
mary and joseph were poor

they could really use that gold!

XMAS GOLD
XMAS GOLD
XMAS GOLD

(how did we get here?
i think we're lost...

it's the same every year)
Track Name: goldplated XMAS
christmas!
christmas!
christmas!

goldplated christmas

there's enough money in this town
for a rich man to drown

christmas torches and christmas pitchforks!
christmas torches and christmas pitchforks!
christmas torches and christmas pitchforks!
christmas torches and christmas pitchforks!

goldplated...
Track Name: freejazz XMAS
freejazz xmas
freejazz xmas
freejazz xmas!

christmas christmas christmas christmas!

[freejazz space interlude]

it's christmas time in prison...

christmas in prison
christmas in prison
christmas in prison

cigarettes
cigarettes
cigarettes
cigarettes

christmas in prison
christmas in prison
christmas in prison
Track Name: no war on XMAS
who doesn't like xmas? i like xmas!

i like eating candy
i like watching movies
i like dicking around
popping chocolates
out of the calendar
counting down days
till i got what i wanted
anticipation made me crazy
sometimes i'd peek in the closet

who doesn't like xmas? i like xmas!

there's no war on xmas
you can't defeat christmas
there's no point even trying

Waaaarrrrrr...

i met an old man
he was a veteran
of the war on xmas

he took a few
but he got through
now he's telling me
his wisdom:

there is no war on xmas!

i've seen things
i can't see
some of them
happened on xmas eve

there is no war on xmas!
there is no war anymore

some people land on their feet
too bad they broke their knees

there is no war on xmas!
there is no war on xmas!

...hide the knives
Track Name: grab 'em by the XMAS
this xmas...
take all you can get
Track Name: annoying XMAS
we wish you an annoying xmas
and a fucked-up new year
Track Name: all i want 4 XMAS
all i want for xmas
is a hearing aid

what'd you say?
oh yeah--happy holidays

all i want for xmas
is a new cane
to help me
up and down
the stairway

all i want for xmas
is no pain
i wanna float free
in the ocean again
Track Name: slothderful XMAS
i got a sloth in my stocking
i got a sloth in my stocking
i got a sloth in my stocking
i got a sloth in my stocking

i got a piece of coal in my stocking
i got a piece of coal in my stocking
i got a piece of coal in my stocking
i got a piece of coal in my stocking

i got a big old turd in my stocking
i got a big old turd in my stocking
i got a big old turd in my stocking
for xmas i got a turd in my stocking
Track Name: lost XMAS
XMS on the stock ticker

XMS is down
sell XMS now
dump XMS
XMS is tanking
XMS went off a cliff
XMS ain't coming back

where did it go? i don't know
Track Name: blah blah XMAS
we are older than you might think we are
that's ok. everybody's 12 on xmas. and under!

chicken fried reindeer steak, blah blah blah
blah blah blah xmas
xmas blah blah blah
blah blah xmas
blah x- blah xmas
...etc.
Track Name: no more XMAS
Q: what happens when you die?

A: we become music. we turn into music!